Uh, excuse me?

It's official. I've come undone.

I've literally put in about 10 hours worth of overtime this week (pro bono) and actually went into the office today (which is in fact a Saturday) to "catch up on some stuff." I think I'm turning into my father. This is all coming as a shock to me. Not even a month ago, my day consisted of archiving old reports while watching Michael Moore documentaries in another window. It seems that as soon as the other summer students left on their own adventures, people have nowhere else to turn for "cheap and effective" labour.

I'm definitely not complaining though. I hate being stressed, but after the always-a-dull-moment summer I've been having, it's kinda refreshing to feel like you're unravelling a little. Will keep you posted...

Blehh

Does it ever seem like life shoots you up just to see you crash and burn?....

Laaaame.

On a side note, my exam went well, along with my Folk Fest weekend. =)

Love this, Part 6?

Quite possibly one of my new fave PostSecret's:

August is here.

Okay, my month of insanity starts......NOW!

August 4th: Folk Fest Opener--Van Morrison at Gallagher Park

August 5th: Work Roadtrip--Driving down to Central Alberta to draw pictures of contaminated sites... =/

August 5th-8th: We Be Jammin'--Folk Festing (for free) all weekend

Augsut 7th: R.I.P. PHIL 145--Early morning final exam at NAIT

August 7th: Second Nighthawks Shift---My reunion with my bed made of a patio chair and a stack mik-crates

August 14th: The Longest Night--Third and final Nighthawks shift

August 24th: 21 Candles

August 26th: Gagaloo--The Monster Ball Tour hits Edmonton =)

August 27th: My Very Last TGIF--Summer work is ovahhh!

August 27th: YEG to YYJ--My epic B.C. roadtrip starts with Victoria.

August 28th: Surfs Up!--Tofino for the weekend.

August 30th: Road Trippin'--The drive back to Edmontown makes a few stops in Vancouver and Kelowna.

September 4th: SONIC BOOM--Weezer, the Arkells, Cold War Kids, Rise Against, and Mother Mother

Septbember 5th: YEG to YYZ--Return to trip to my lovely T.O.

Septbember 7th: Possible mini-trip to NYC??

Umm, what?

Sooo I did this online Life Stress Test at work today, and apparently I'm unstable?

Lametastic July

Summer work has definitely lost it's novelty. I literally spent the entire week helping people get ready for the field assignments that I don't get to go on. I was pretty much just a glorified baggage handler/personal shopper---hitting up Home Depot and racking up some credit card debt on sportsman gear and ATV helmets.

I keep having to tell myself, "You know, Marc, when Lauren Conrad interned at Teen Vogue, she didn't get to do anything fun." It does make me feel better, until I remember one of those lame episodes of the Hills where she gets to work backstage at Teen Vogue's L.A. Fashion Week Party or Prada's Spring Runway Show. Well, these trips to the Arctic are my runway shows. It's literally the only reason I wanted this job. Luckily, in the next couple of weeks, I'll have the even more incredible opportunity of watching everyone else arrange their Canadian North flights on Carlson Wagonlit, while they ask me to book them some ATV's or a couple helicopter trips. Then, I'll get the even more rare experience of creeping all of their Facebook photos and hearing all their stories about the polar bears and inuit tribes they encountered and how it caused them to have such a great epiphany that they've decided to pursue a career in Social Work or Natural Resources Management, all while we enjoy some delicious Wok that their overtime pay could easily cover two-hundred times over. Life's just not fair.

Anyhow, tonight is my first shift of NighHawk overnight security at the Folk Fest grounds. It should be a lot of fun, as long as I can manage to stay up for the entire twelve hours and not get sick of the person I'm volunteering with.

Love this, part 4? I've lost track...

itsjustoneofthosedays

So I'm pretty sure I fail at life. This Friday has been AWFUL. For starters, I woke up late, again. Then, while rushing out the door into what is probably our 27th consecutive day of heavy rain, I never noticed that my back tire was flat or that the gas light had been on for probably several days. As I pulled up into the Village Landing Starbucks for my morning coffee, someone honked to inform me that I’m apparently a noob at vehicle maintenance, and suggested that I should probably not continue to drive on my flat. So, I did what any independent 20-year old would do: I called my mother. Ten minutes later, she showed up in her pajamas to switch vehicles for me so that I could continue on my way to work while she got the old tire fixed.

Then, I figured, seeing as I was already going to be late for the third day in a row, the least I could do was get my morning cup of Pike to make this miserable day slightly more enjoyable. Of course, when God is on a revenge streak, he doesn’t stop at 7:30 in the morning. I got stuck with the new girl, or Barista-in-training, at Starbucks, who interpreted "no room for cream" as a half-full cup of coffee. Being in a pissy mood already, the last thing I wanted to do was complain. So I just left, figuring I could top it off at work with some of that nasty Van Houtte “Hawaiian Islands” blend that they’ve overstocked in my break room.

AND THEN, after arriving at work at the punctual time of 8:20, I received an email from Accounts Payable letting me know that my mega-expense claim, the one that literally took me an hour to put together, was rejected. Apparently, I forgot to subtract a $2.00 charitable donation from one my receipts.

Gah, I knew I would regret donating to Wal-mart’s Special Olympics Fund…..

OH AND THEN, to make myself feel better, I made the fully rational decision to binge on the leftover pastries that the Friday Donut Club didn’t feel like eating. Helloo, Tubsy....

How the Other Half Copes

So, my most recent obsession is PBS Frontline Documentaries (I know, I'm pretty much 70 years old). Anyways, I watched this documentary a little awhile ago and stumbled upon it again today. It's about how people in the Upper East Side of Manhattan, one of America's most affluent neighbourhoods, are coping with the financial meltdown. It's pretty good, even though the producer is just a little elitist.

Feeling a Little Psychotic

So, after sitting through the finales of both of MTV's geographically-named reality series, The Hills and The City, along with my Dad's favourite show, America's Got Talent, I decided to indulge in some good ol' American Psychosis. Please read this article, it is quite entertaining.

Just Another Day at the Office....

So I was lucky enough to head off to Japser for work on Friday. I'm pretty sure it was my first field assignment without any complications: no collisions with wildlife, no contractor issues, nothing! It was definitely a nice change of pace from the office.

I've been feeling a little burned out lately. With work and all the shit I have left to accomplish before heading back to Waterloo, I feel like I haven't really had a summer vacation. On top of that, my favourite little fugitive, Colton Harris-Moore, was captured today after a high-speed boat race in Barbados! Soo sad.

I decided to turn down all my plans for Saturday night so I could have little me time and attempt to work on my extensive to-do list. My dad ended up taking me out for dinner and I drank a little too much wine, so I didn't really get anything accomplished. Then, the regret sunk in the morning after, as I creeped through my friends' Facebook pictures from the night before. Life is just chalk full of little dilemmas....

Bitches Runnin' Wild

My happiness wave came to a crashing halt today at work. Some guy that the company is trying to recruit was making the rounds and introduced himself at my cubicle today and asked what I was studying at Waterloo. Now, typically, I'll get the "Urban Planning! I wish I did something like that instead of civil engineering!" or the more recent "I can't believe our new Governor-General is from Waterloo!" both of which do a great job at stroking my ego. But no, this guy decided to jump into this five-minute long anecdote about how his childhood friend took Urban Planning at SAIT Polytechnic (which isn't even a university) and how she never found a job after graduation, so she decided to become a "communications expert." All I could say was, "Thanks? That's great to know...."

Rather than stew in anger and frustration, my anxiety kicked in and I literally spent the rest of the morning checking the unemployment rate for urban planners. Luckily, this d-bag is also very uninformed, as planners still have a lower unemployment rate than architects, our arch-nemeses.

Fortunately, karma rewarded me for holding back my desire to strangle someone and I'm being sent to Jasper for a day-trip tomorrow....to do literally 10 MINUTES (yes, just ten minutes) of work! I'm actually driving 7 hours to Maligne Lake (expenses, mileage, overtime and $51 per diem included) to take pictures of this contractor while he fills in a hole the size of my desk, fun times...

Love this, Part 3

I stumbleupon'ed this gem:

Back in Action

I had the most bizarre dream last night. Somebody hacked my blog and revamped it into one huge ad for Viagra and Cialis, just like those spam emails with the subject header "Re: Hi" that I always get duped into opening. So, I figured it was probaby a sign that I should update this thing before someone else does.

The past week has been a whirlwind. I've literally been busy every night since last Sunday, and have hardly had the time to breathe, let alone work on my Philosophy course (on that note, whoever said first-year Philosophy was a joke was seriously delusional). I was fortunate to catch up with a lot of people that I haven't seen in a longgg time, and rack up a $500 credit card balance from buying coffee and skinny jeans. I even took a 4-day break from the borg and ditched the city with a dozen friends from high school to do some serious camping/drinking/swimming in hypothermic lake water.

I've decided to take it slow for awhile, so this week will be super laze...

P.S: Reading Google News this morning, I was a little envious to see that the Queen is visiting Waterloo today, during the four months that I'm not there. First, it was Stephen Hawking and now this???

Les P'tits Canards, Part 2

Good news!

While Downtown T.O. burns to the ground, there was a small victory in my hometown on Friday. Syncrude was found guilty for the deaths of 1,600 ducks that took a dip in one of their tailings ponds! Now, the company could face $800,000 in fines (chump change for any oil conglomerate) OR 6 months in prison for company executives.

Personally, I think the second option sounds fairly attractive!

Dunzo!

I'm finally finished the first book I've read for fun in like, 5 years! That's probably one of the lamest things I've ever said, but sadly, it's the truth. I've had this issue in university where I feel useless if I'm not constantly doing something productive. So, the only books I've attempted to read talk about good city-building and why our planet is going down the tubes. Surprisingly, these aren't the most entertaining topics. Whenever I let myself have any "me" time alone, I'm so tired of doing all this work that I always decide to watch reruns of Intervention or wine taste or do any sort of activity that gradually turns my brain into silly putty.

Since I started studying for my GRE, I kinda realized: how am I ever going to do well in grad school, or even enjoy it, when I hate reading? I decided I needed to started reading for fun again! It couldn't be that bad? Then, while at the U of A a few weeks ago, I was drawn to this Lionel Shriver novel on their clearance rack called We Need to Talk About Kevin. Without reading the book jacket, I impulsively decided to buy it.

It's probably the best decision I've made in a long time! The book is about this mother writing letters to her estranged husband about their son, who killed 10 people at his high school. It's pretty grim, but really says a lot about parenthood and how we treat our young people. In the last couple of days, I've put off my summer school assignment just so I could finish reading the final 100 pages, which were AMAZING!!! After celebrating this great accomplishment (yeah, I pretty much read at a grade 6 level...) I couldn't stop thinking about the book and Wiki'ed it during a lull at work. If things didn't get any better, they're turning it into a movie now! Finally, I get to be the one who relishes in telling people that "the book was just so much better than the movie." I can't wait!!

Like, ohmygosh?! I totally pictured Tilda Swinton as Eva Katchadourian....

Weekending

These past couple days have been busy, busy. I spent Thursday and Friday doing water quality testing at Camrose's landfill. Wow, was that an educational experience. The engineer I was working with told me, "I wish everyone could visit a landfill at least once." There's a lot of truth to that. I found old couches in amazing condition, recyclable electronics and water bottles, the environmentalist's new enemy du jour, littered all over the landfill's most recent cell, which is the engineer's euphemism for "pile of garbage."

On my way back home, I decided to make a detour through the city of Camrose (on company time) for one particular reason: I really needed to see Augustana Campus. You see, I have this weird bourgeois complex where I'm constantly second-guessing my choice of schools. Back in high school, I applied to Augustana, a tiny satellite campus of the University of Alberta. I actually got rejected by them, which is probably one of the only times I've been rejected from anything in my entire life. Anyways, I was pleased to discover that the campus was super dull, and super small. And Camrose is one of those cities that are great places to die: packed full of old people and businesses that cater to old people.

I got a much-needed break this weekend and skipped out of town this weekend to camp at Pembina River. I got to hike around and catch some sun, and hang out with my friend's Frat, which is half made up of people from my high school, so it was an awesome chance to do some serious catching up!

Pembina River <3

Word of the Day

From UrbanDictionary:

WALMART
A store where you can buy a shot gun, ammunition, a ski mask, a baseball bat, a meat cleaver and a chainsaw, but you can't buy a CD that has a "Parental Advisory" sticker.

Shit in Gear, Part 2

Now that my trip is done and my job is growing monotonous, my summer is slowly starting to settle down. I genuinely miss running around all the time and being super busy, so I've decided I need a creative outlet to keep me entertained for the rest of the summer. My original plan was to become an advocate for more affordable transit, but my Mom thinks that would be a "bad career move."

Seeing as I'm not a novelist, that pretty much limits me to Scrapbooking. Yes, I've decided to make a scrapbook. But, I'm not just making your average everyday scrapbook for a trip to Calgary or my first baby (*shudders*), I've decided to make a scrapbook for the first 20 years of my life! I'm obsessed with self-reflection and self-improvement, or any other motivational word with the prefix "self," and I figured that this would be a fun way to put my self-love into action!

On top of that, I sorta made a mini-to do list for the rest of the summer:
1) Finish my GRE for Dummies.
2) Save $10,000 (this one's gonna be a bitch...I may have to start blow-counting again)
3) Lose 2 pounds.
4) Go to Vegas!!!!!!!!11
5) Plan a trip to NYC for September! This one is my favourite! I originally wanted to slip off for a week to wash oil off of shorebirds on the Mississippi Delta, but figured it wouldn't be as glamourous as I had imagined, so I've decided that I'm going to treat myself to a mini-vacation in the Big Apple before school starts. Originally, I had to stay home because of other commitments and miss Frosh Week, but now I have the whole week to myself! So I figured, why not spend some of that $10,000 I saved? =)
And finally, 6) Find lodging in Brisbane (that's what Australian people call housing ;) )

T-minus 8 months!

This video made my day just a little brighter =)

Moolah Moolah Moolah

At the local 7-Eleven....

Marc: Hi, can I get this slurpee and one of those lotto tickets that are really big right now?

7-Eleven Girl: You mean Lotto Max?

Marc: Sure!

7-Eleven Girl: Do you want the Extra?

Marc: What?

7-Eleven Girl: It's like a second chance of winning for an extra dollar?

Marc: Umm...noo...

I am officially a 60-year old lotto fiend....

Love this, part 2.

Check itt: thxthxthx.com

Late Registration

Ugh, its that time of year again....enrollment appointments. Am I that lame to make a huge deal over enrolling for classes?

Simply put, I haven't had the best of luck registering in classes: I've take twice as many first-year courses as I'm allowed to (meaning at least one extra term), I always fight to get into a 6th course only to drop it after the first week of classes and, most importantly, I have this obsession with scheduling days off. I actually haven't had a 5-day week of classes since high school. This awesome setup has come at a cost though. Rather than taking classes that I'm genuinely interested in or might benefit me in my career, I've taken exciting courses like The Fundamentals of Drawing (alright kids, lets draw some more naked 50-year olds), Freight Planning (trucks or trains?), Stormwater Management (there's too much shit in our water), and my personal favourite, Social Psychology in Everyday Life (too much for words...whoever said the Arts were easy never sat through one of these lectures).

My intense scheduling, along with my waffling over specializations, minors and other buzz-words to add to my diploma, I've managed to screw up all the hard work my advisor put into making me a simple plan to finish my degree in 3 years. On top of that, I'm going to Brisbane for school this year (ch'yeaaa)! Probably the only downside to Australia is that school there is really lax. They take 4-courses a term and mostly have 3-year degrees, meaning most of courses I'm taking only transfer over as first or second-year courses, which I definitely have more than enough of.

Yesterday, I was telling a project engineer about my colourful year at school and he asked me the question I absolutely loathe hearing: "When are you gonna be finished?" He then began to glare wildly when I told him that I wasn't really sure when I'd be graduating. Oh sorry, I didn't realize there was suddenly a stigma attached to enjoying my youth...

In reality, it makes me restless to not know when I'll be finished my undergrad, to not be able to make plans or try to envision where I'll be in two years. But I'm trying to keep it all in perspective. I have the rest of my life to slave away at a 9-to-5, what difference does one year make?

__________________________________

P.S: Random pet peeve-- I hate when I decide to spend my lunch break lurking blogs and the only ones I come across are about Catholic families or new babies.

OMG Beach Party Playset?!

TGIF

It's Friday! Only 8 more hours of work until I'm unleashed from my tiny cubicle. I'm definitely looking forward to getting out of the city this weekend and getting shit-faced on an empty beach up North. Meanwhile, my parents are going to some Alberta PC Party "Lobster Boil Fundraiser" tonight. I told them not to bother going, seeing as they'll probably be the only people there. My Mom looked confused and said, "Of course there's gonna be other people, who doesn't like lobster?"

My summer is starting to pan out into something not-so-shitty. I found out yesterday that one of my closest friends at school will be joining me for drunken shenanigans in Las Vegas in August, which brings the total number of people in my wolfpack to 7! On top of that, I found out that I will most likely be volunteering at the Edmonton Folk Music Festival, which means free tickets to Ben Harper, Van Morrison, Dala, Colin Hay and tons of other bands! Finally, I actually had no clue that Eclipse, the next Twilight movie, is actually coming out in a month! IN IMAX!!!!!111 I know I probably sound like the biggest tool right now, but Twilight is actually my biggest guilty pleasure. I think I watched the first movie at least a dozen times. If you haven't seen the movies or read the books, just watch the first 15 minutes of Twilight. It plays with your emotions and insecurities and you'll seriously be hooked.

Can you say midnight screening with a theatre full of 12-year olds?

If you're bored and need a good laugh, I strongly suggest you check out Hyperbole and a Half and their "Sneaky Hate Spiral." It's probably one of the funniest things I've read all week.

Mac Attack

On Monday, my boss randomly surprised with an overnight business trip....

....to Fort McMurray.

Seriously though, my company operates in Europe, the U.S., and Asia, and I get to travel to the exotic oilsands city.

Fort Mac is in the Athabasca River valley, which is actually a really beautiful area. Its too bad that they've reworked or destroyed most of it to get at the most dirty form of oil on Earth. On top of that, the whole Wood Buffalo region is a vegan's worst nightmare. In a sprawly city of 100,000, the only places we could eat at were McDonald's, Burger King, or Tim Horton's. Oh, and it was Camp Day, so Tim Horton's was just out of the question...

Before leaving, the biologist I was working with decided to show me the Syncrude Mildred Lake operation, one of the biggest in the region. I even got to see the infamous tailings ponds that were responsible for killing all those ducks! Those things are the size of lakes. Someone might actually think they look kinda cool if they didn't know they were full of toxic chemical effluent.

I would have just loved to go kayaking on this.

Otherwise, my week has been oh so lame. Work has been awful and it still feels like January outside. However, I'm getting a much needed break from the cesspool that is St. Albert this weekend and heading up to my friend's cabin. Weeooo!

One Hot Mess

Apparently, getting trashed on expensive drinks is becoming a cherished hobby of mine. Some friends and I went to Julio's Barrio last night (aka the best Mexican food in Edmonton) to celebrate a friend's birthday. After hearing that it would be an hour for a table, a friend and I decided to fuck everyone and get saucy at the bar.

I had spent my afternoon watching a Home at the End of the World and getting buzzed on some Sauvignon Blanc that I picked up in Bordeaux, and I was feeling newly inspired to live eclectically. I ended up having 3 Mexican Bulldogs (at $12.00 each) before wandering out onto Whyte Avenue for some impromptu dancing.

Me sipping on a delicious Bulldog at my 19th.

I had an amazing heart-to-heart with an old friend from high school out on the street, and he told me I looked "hipster skinny." It was probably the best compliment I've gotten in a longgg time.

Minus doing questionable things involving questionable substances, and calling my 16-year old sister to pick me up, it was a good night.

European Graffiti

Dear Blogosphere,

Please go see Exit Through the Gift Shop, it's probably one of the best movies I've seen all year.

With Love,

Marcus

Le Snobisme

I'm starting to settle into my summer here in Edmonton and, as usual, I'm starting to second-guess my "life choices." In case you didn't know, my life has been interesting lately. I spent the first 18 years of my life living in the white-washed suburbs of Edmonton. Then, I did a year of liberal arts and got accepted into a really good Business School for International Business, and I threw it all away on a whim, as I figured I'd never be happy building a career on helping corporations maximise profits and take advantage of people, while infusing buzz-words and schmoozy language into everyday conversation. I left the Texas of the North to study Urban Planning at Waterloo. Ever since then, I've been bouncing back and forth between the two places, never staying in the same spot for longer than 4 months. It's always been my dream to go away for school and relish my newfound independence. I began to over-indulge in telling people about how I was so glad that "I got out of St. Albert," and I started to show contempt for people who "just didn't have their shit in gear."

Nowadays, I feel so unsettled, like I'm rootless. I don't really have strong relationships with anyone simply because I only see most people about four times a year and have terrible time keping in touch with old friends. My concept of home has become a "grey area." I have a hard time feeling grateful anytime I have a change of scenery. On top of that, I'm constantly poor, which kinda sucks. Bourgeois kids just aren't raised to have budgets and make sacrifices.

These uncomfortable feelings really bitch-slapped me in the face a few days ago. I got in a fight with my parents after they let my brother drive the family truck to the U of Alberta campus to drop off his writing portfolio, while I took the bus there just two hours earlier to do homework. My mom got mad a t me and awkwardly described me a "Toronto Snob who intentionally acted like he wasn't part of the family." She apologized almost immediately and has been especially nice to me since then, waking up early to make me breakfast smoothies and letting me drive her Toyota.

To be honest though, it didn't really offend me. Well, the part about hating my family offended me, but I actually took the "Toronto Snob" name as a compliment. I've never actually lived in the city, but I wouldn't hesitate to pack up and go there after my undergrad. But whyyy you might ask???

Well for starters, Toronto is actually a city. Edmonton might legally be a city, but it's not actually a city. Relatively speaking, Edmonton is small. Only a million people are brave enough to live this far north, and for some reason they all feel they need to live on a half-acre of cheap land and still have a 20-minute commute as their reward. Our only claim to fame is a shopping mall, a decrepite shrine to capitalism and over-consumption. And it's not even a nice mall......

On the other hand, Toronto has a lot going for it. It's Canada's largest city and one of the most multicultural cities in the world. They actually consider social progress and sustainable living to be a good thing, rather than some toxic evil that's just going to make it harder to drive your Hummer H2 to work.

Does Edmonton's Riverfront look like this?

The whole incident reminded me of this awesome quote from one of the most random movies I've ever seen, Hamlet 2. At the end of the movie, the whole cast goes to NYC to celebrate the launch of their Broadway play (OH SHIT, SPOILER ALERT!!!1111). One of the kids, Chuy, tells his teacher about how awesome New York is compared to Tucson, their hometown. Their drama teacher responds, "Chuy, you're going to live a magicial life because, no matter where you go, it's always going to be better than Tucson." This will sound stupid, but this quote kinda motivates me and gives me hope that these restless feelings will shake off as soon as I peace out for new adventures!

The City of Lights

Sorry for the lack of recent blog posts! I just got back from an internet-free trip to Paris and France's Aquitaine region. After spending a week at a restored French farmhouse in the heart of wine country (soo much wine) my family rented an apartment on l'Avenue des Bordonnais in the 7ieme arrondissement of Paris. We got to the city during a long weekend in France, so we definitely picked the worst time to tour around the most visited city in the world. There were tons of people everywhere, but I still managed to see a lot of the city.

The view from my apartment window=magnifique!

I left feeling a little jealous that I wasn't living in such a beautiful city and the birthplace of modern democracy, in a country where people are entitled to two-hour lunch breaks and five weeks of vacation. Some of my friends that have visited Paris have told me that they want to live there in the future, and I was starting to agree with them....

However, I think tourists seem to wear the thickest rose-colored glasses. Hell, I've had people who have visited Edmonton tell me that it's the best city in Canada? Before I could wallow in the reality that I'm trapped in miserable/white-washed St. Albert, while millions of people are living within a stone's throw of Champs d'Elysee, I hit up Wikipedia to learn what's really up in old Pareee. Here's what I discovered:

1. While North American cities are infamous for white flight and sprawling high-income suburbs, European cities are the polar opposite. Parisians will pay millions of their shitty currency to buy a 500-square-foot apartment on l'Avenue de la Grande Armee, while the banlieues (meaning "suburbs") contain some of the world's largest social housing projects for low-income immigrant families, which are beautifully referred to as les cités in French. These poor living conditions came to light to much of the world during the 2005 riots in Paris' northeastern suburbs. (On a side note: If you can understand French, try and find a copy of La Haine, it does a pretty good job of showing life in les banlieues).

2. Their currency is worth as much as dog poop, thanks to Greece. (On a side note: I actually predicted this in a term paper I wrote for a Poli Sci class four years ago and got like a 75. Thank god for appeals...)

3. Nobody in Paris recycles, like actually nobody. I'm pretty sure I only saw one recycling bin during my entire visit. On top of that, nobody picks up their doggy dooty (And you think they would, seeing as they can now buy their morning baguette and pack of Marlboros with it).

4. French people are actually kinda racist. While Canada is trying to attract as many skilled immigrants as possible, immigration to France is becoming heavily restricted. As the nice French lady that sat beside me on the plane explained to me: They have some of the best social programs in the world. Why would they want an influx of newcomers to ruin them? Meanwhile, their "world-class" schools won't let students wear articles of clothing that reflect their religious beliefs while they teach them about the "positive consequences" of French colonialism.

5. Paris actually does smell bad, like a musty/mothbally urine smell, probably from all the dog poop.

Great, I feel slightlyyy better about not missing my flight back to frigid northern Alberta....

Hard Knock Life

Back to work for the 2^nd week of like, 16? At least I’m finally doing real work, which makes it much less painful to read incoming interview offers from firms that I applied to months ago. I’ve seriously gotten at least 4 emails from different municipalities since starting my job. I mean, who actually waits until mid-May to hire summer students? Oh wellz…I’m actually starting to enjoy my job now. I’m working on environmental assessments with this super chill Environmental Scientist. She pretty much gave me total control of the project. I even get to contact clients, which is something that the folks in Planning and Landscape would have never even considered last year. The other co-ops are awesome too. Lunch breaks are actually ten times better when you spend them conversing with other people and playing cards, rather than mindlessly creeping Facebook and OMG-UW.

I’ve officially been on the ‘tane for a week now. In that week, I went on a three-day binge and gained 4 pounds (which I lost by literally spending the entire weekend doing p90x and watching documentaries about the obesity epidemic while working out on my exercise bike), my entire face dried out and then broke out, and I’ve had the most bizarre dreams. I’ve heard of people having night terrors while on isoretinoins, but my dreams have just been really weird. For example, after spending yesterday with my mother, I had this dream where she vividly told me that I was her toughest experience in parenting because I was a Student Works Franchisee. It didn’t even make sense. I had an even weirder dream on Saturday night, where my friend from high school transferred to Laurier Business, and then we both dropped out to start a daycare. Sure, these dreams don’t have dragons or take place in Nazi Germany (which is literally where half my dreams take place), but they felt really real. I actually remember every detail from them, and when I woke up I still didn’t realize they were fictitious.

It's probably an early symptom of schizophrenia or something…

***

"And we’re just like how Rousseau depicts man in the state of nature: We’re underdeveloped, we’re ignorant, we’re stupid....

but we’re happy."

Ignorance is Bliss

Someone needs to take the weekend off and read And the Band Played On:

"If you are not doing needles and you are not gay, you wouldn’t get AIDS probably, that’s the bottom line."

-Councillor Rob Ford, Toronto Mayoral Candidate

The Grind

It’s back-to-work time! I looaathe this time of year: the early commutes, the 8-hour workdays, my empty cubicle, the strange parallels between my work and the stuff on Office Space. This year is a little different though. Unlike last summer, the firm actually hired multiple summer students. Although they’re all chummy from school, they’re still awesome! We get together everyday for lunch and to "discuss" about the mind-numbing tasks assigned to us. One of the things I was always envious about my friends in co-op was the friendships they made during their work terms. In my department last year, it seemed everyone was so cliquey, or just never took the time to chat with me because they were so career-driven. So, it's been a nice change this year.

I made the mistake of telling my father this morning that I hated working, and he took it really personally. It’s not that I hate my job, I just hate working. And I’m pretty sure 95% of the world is on the same page as me. Like, if someone handed me a cheque for a billion dollars, the first thing I would do would be to quit my job. Wouldn't everyone?

Les P'tits Canards

Wow, it's been like a five days since I wrote anything substantial on here. I need to get into a better bloggin' routine...

My week off has been fairly busy. I finished all of my appointments on Thursday with an early morning trip to the dentist (no cavities!!) and have just been hanging out with friends and going out a lot. I saw The Messenger on Friday at the Garneau at 109th and 87th. It was really good, but really, really sad. Just like The Hurt Locker, I once again had to explain to my Dad the meaning behind the movie as soon as it was over.

Ever since I was really young, I've made an effort to stay informed about what's going on in the world. I check Google News almost every morning, along with the often hilarious Toronto Sun Cover Reviews. Once in a while, I'll find a story that I'll really latch onto. Often, I'll intensely research the issue and regularly bring it up in conversation with complete strangers. In the past year, I've saturated my brain with information on Bill 44, the Myspace suicide, and U.S. healthcare reform.

Most recently, my "major beef" is the Syncrude trial taking place just down the street from my house! For those of you that don't know, Syncrude is one of the big players in Alberta's oilsands industry. Essentially, they're "the shit" at destroying acres of the northern Alberta landscape and polluting our rivers and air. As Syncrude's lawyers have made very clear, one key feature of any oilsands operation is the tailings ponds used to contain noxious pollutants and excess bitumen. These toxic lagoons are often the size of small towns. Well, back in 2008, about 1,600 ducks thought it would be fun to chill in one of Syncrude's tailings ponds and never made it out alive.

Now, the company is on trial for the incident. Syncrude's lawyer has made ridiculous claims that the ducks maliciously decided to land in the tailings pond, as waterfowl are apparently supposed to be fully aware of the contents of these ponds. Now, their lawyer has even boldly stated that if his client is found guilty, Alberta's oilsands industry will be "doomed." The older more outdated Marc (circa 2007ish?) would probably have sympathized with Syncrude's claims. However, Marc 2.0, equipped with two years of education in environmental studies, genuinely hopes this trial spells the end of the oilsands industry. I honestly don't think there would be a greater blessing for this province's future.

Syncrude's closing arguments are on Wednesday and I can't wait to see what happens.

Love this

Shit in Gear

My week off has quickly transformed into a week of medical appointments. My mother's concerns over the insane shortage of doctors in Ontario means that everytime I come back to St. A, I spend a good chunk of my time getting cavities filled, peeing in cups, and endlessly staring at the white walls in waiting rooms, all in an attempt to maintain my salubrity (which means "good health," one of the many fancy words I learned while studying vocabulary for my GRE this weekend).

However, today was a very productive visit to the doctor's office. While lazing forever in his office, my doctor/former Student Works Painting client randomly stormed into the room, looked at me and said, "You need Accutane." FINALLY!!! I've literally been waiting for years for the day when my doctor finally prescribed this miracle drug to me. Sure, it can potentially cause liver damage and eczema, but it will make me look pretty again! Yes, I'm aware that that's a very shallow thing to say, but my pulchritude (meaning "beauty") is at stake!

On a less health-related note, I saw The Runaways yesterday. It was actually really good, even though it only got a 62 on Rotten Tomatoes. Seeing Dakota Fanning as a coked-out trainwreck pretty much made my week. Here's the preview if you've never heard of it:

Back to Where I Came From

The trip back to Edmonton was soo long. Three days without showering or sleeping in an actual bed feels more like weeks. I left the train feeling smelly and haggard, like the homeless people that chill outside of Toronto City Hall.

Canada really is beautiful….desolate, but beautiful. After two years of being consumed by the ideas of people like Rachel Carson and Jane Jacobs, I was under the impression that most of Canada’s natural landscape had been reworked or destroyed altogether. As soon as I left the Greater Toronto Area, I hardly saw any signs of civilization for most of my trip. I packed my new Nikon with photos of shimmering lakes and the bits of the Canadian Shield. Here are some of my fave photos:

Before embarking on my epic cross-country tour, I got the chance to have dinner and shop with some of the old SPUC crew. It was a really great way to spend my last night in South ON.

I managed to take this picture from my train window with only my 18-55mm lens. I love this picture because it shows how, before the time of hardcore setbacks and development standards, people in “bush communities” would build right up to the railway tracks, almost as if it would help their town reap the benefits of rail traffic passing through.

Downtown Winnipeg: Don't let the amusement park in the foreground fool you, as this is probably one of the loneliest cities I've ever visited. Wandering through the downtown core, I literally saw three people. The only restaurant I could find after twenty minutes of walking was a Tim Horton's.

Overall, the weekend-long trip was a good experience that I definitely do not regret. However, I honestly don’t think I’ll ever do it again.

P.S: Did you know there’s MSG in Cheese Nips? Yeah, I found that out the hard way…

***

“You don’t belong to people forever.”

Toba

I woke up on the train this morning to the sight of stuccoed ranch-style bungalows and abandoned Wheat Pool containers and immediately knew that I was back in the Prairies. It feels good to be back, but I'm having a hard time getting excited for my return to the Purple City when I feel soooo lethargic. I've already decided that I'm never taking the train back home again. It's been cool to see the vast expanse that is Canada, but it's also been terribly long.

Hopefully, I'll get my energy back tomorrow morning when I cross the North Saskatchewan. =)

Crazyy-ness

Soo, I decided to go back to Cambridge Architecture yesterday. Once again, only one trainer could be persuaded into making the trip, so I was happy to co-facilitate one final Architecture session. As usual, it went fantastically well. My one disappointment is that there was no thank you card or pretty bonus cheque waiting at the office for me the next day.

Oh, the trials of being under-appreciated.

My co-facilitator and I kinda rushed through the session so we could make it back to Waterloo for FRANK WARREN. Yes, the Frank Warren of Postsecret.com came to UW last night. It was incredible. At one point, he opened up to the audience and asked people to share their secrets. I was expecting the cheezy "I'm in love with my best friend" and "I'm so tired of school" secrets, but not the ones shared by some of my classmates. I was both shocked and saddened. After the event, Frank sent a link to all the attendees for a "special archive" of never-before-seen secrets. I have yet to digest all of them, but here's one of my faves:

I'm leaving Waterloo tomorrow and I feel that this secret parallels a lot of what I'm experiencing in my own life. I really wanted to stay at school for the summer, but I'm trying to stay positive and think about all the exciting adventures that await me back in Edmonton. To start, I'm taking the train back. How fuckin' awesome is that?

One More Time...

Today's adventures brought me to Cambridge, Ontario. I was asked to train Waterloo Architecture's Orientation Leaders and did not hesitate at the chance. Apparently, I was the only one duped into doing it, as the office assistant never found a co-trainer to facilitate the sessions with me. I was still really stoked at the opportunity. Seeing as I'll be in Brisbane next year, it would be one final chance to do the only job I have actually enjoyed in my entire life. Also, a part of me was insatiably curious to visit the architecture school and meet some legit Archie's. You see, half of the planning students at Waterloo were actually prospective architecture students who were given a spot in planning as an alternate offer. I've heard both praises and slams about the school, a refurbished silk mill, and the eccentric students that literally inhabit its studios for most of the year. I went there expecting to drop onto the set of School Ties or Cruel Intentions, or some strange combination of both, and was happily mistaken.

It was a great day. The school was amazing and the people were even more amazing. Above all, it totally broke the stereotypes I had of the typical architecture student. On top of that, I got applause from the orientation leaders at the end of the day and free pizza from one of their leaders, neither of which has ever happened to me before. I think one of the greatest joys in life is knowing that your work is genuinely appreciated by people, and today proved that belief once again.

Yet another reason why this end-of-term is turning out to be one of the best! =)

Waterloo Architecture overlooking the Grand River.

Tee-dot-ohh

So I went to Toronto today for some much needed retail therapy. I managed to get suckered into call-backs from three random charities that were canvassing on street corners. I'm such a chump. Probably the coolest incident today was when the brick wall above a sushi restaurant at Gould and Yonge collapsed onto the sidewalk. It was fricken intense! I managed to get a picture with my snazzy camera phone:

Mad Skrill

Given that my exams are completely finished, I decided to go shopping. And I'm doing some hella intense shopping. First, I bought a new pair of high-top Lakai's at Soho Sneaker Shop in Uptown. I personally think they're beautiful. Then, I bought spraypaint. Why you may ask? To redo my old pair of Lakai's. A classmate of mine spray-paints his shoes whenever he gets tired of them, so I figured I'd give it a try. I'm going all-out with firey neon orange.

Schmexyy.

After buying spray paint, I decided to treat myself with a delicious waffle cone at DQ. While relaxing on the patio outside, an old man wandered over and asked why I was eating alone. I nonchalantly replied, "Everyone I know has exams." He then sat down and began to tell me about his days as an undergrad. Now, I originally found this a little uncomfortable. Old people say hello to me a lot, but have never proceeded to join me while I try to enjoy my fatty ice cream. However, this guy seemed harmless and so I decided to chat him up. We talked for literally an hour about the most random topics, like poetry, brutalist architecture and health-care reform. He suggested this book of 1940's poetry by an anthologist named Untermeyer (?) that I'm seriously going to look up. It turns out, this guy is a priest at the college beside my school. Usually, my seething militant atheism tends to discourage religious people from talking to me, so I'm happy we were able to have such a great conversation.

Anyways, this conversation inspired me to live more passionately. I left Dairy Queen and headed over to Bent's Photography, which is this cute little camera shop in Uptown Waterloo. A co-trainer once told me about how she went in there looking for a used camera, and the owner offered her a free one on the condition that she "pay it forward" with one random act of kindness. I mean, how cute is that?! After chatting with a salesman for a few minutes, I decided to take the plunge and buy a Nikon D3000 Digital SLR, my new baby. Altogether it came to $650, which is a lot when you're current monthly income is $50. I'm already starting to take trendy photos, including this one of my favourite building in my neighbourhood, the Seagram Lofts.

Prints of this beauty are only $500

I'm so stoked to get good at photography, but not until I'm finished fulfilling my duties as a consumer. I've randomly decided to take the commuter bus into Toronto tomorrow morning and spend the remainder of my tax return cheque! It'll also be a goodbye of sorts to the city before my train takes me home next Thursday.

When it's over, is it really over?

Welcome to my brand new blog!

My 3A term is FINALLY over, and I figured that it's time I started blogging again. I was fortunate to have a somewhat random year at Waterloo, and totally regretted not regularly sharing any of my experiences. Unlike my old blog (which was pretty much high schooler-esque ranting about meanies), this blog is more of a collaboration between you guys, and me! So respond, criticize or share any of my blog entries freely! =)

With love,

Marcus

P.S: So the title of this post is totally a reference to Sugar Ray. A few weekends ago, a co-trainer and I decided to have a 90's-themed Diversity and Harassment session for Orientation Leader Training (aka OLT). I think people genuinely enjoyed it, despite the awkward discussions on racism and homophobia.

I wish I could drive around California on a Vespa.